Perilous
The Crossroads is only the beginning of the journey. It is the merging and separation of 2 worlds. It is neither here nor there. It is a place fraught with peril. Who will still be with us in June?
B shows up 45 minutes late. He is nervous and unsure. He searches for my disapproval in a glance. He has court in 3 days. Later he asks "So how do you think I'm doin?" He has missed 4 days. Been late all the rest but 1. Missed his 1st counseling session. I say he's not doin so good. We won't be able to do this all year. His time is running out. They will force other options. There is a lot of work to do. He can do it. The choice is his. Even though it is beyond him. In many ways it is so beyond him. At this point all I can do is throw the dice and pray for luck.
N is in JDC. He will be there for at least 2 weeks. He is out of control at home and refuses to cooperate. We will wait for him. Things do not look good.
B-2 shows up 1/2 hour late. He missed last Thursday. His parents have called his PO. He says he is sick. His face is puffy and he seems congested. He is wearing a white parka that seems to fit him too small. He sits in a daze. His PO is gathering force.
L is not here today. This makes 2. It is hard to reach his dad. He works in a vault in a bank. We always get his voice-mail. He always responds with good intentions and concerns. L does not seem to do well on Mondays. It seems he spends the weekend at his mother's and must transition back to his father's late Sunday. 2 days is not bad but we are just getting started. It is easy for these things to tumble out of control.
R-1 is back. His PO did not find him over the weekend to give him his gift of 48 hours. He said that L was havig contractions and that he had to take her to the hospital. He could not call. He had no minutes on his cell. His home phone is disconnected. His PO comes by to see him but we are on a walk to the bridge. He knows now that his PO is gathering force.
A-2 is not here. He is always here. But not today. His father calls. Things are not good at home. A-2 refuses to go to school because he has no shoes. His father says there are 6 pairs in the closet. His headphones are an issue It's the gangster rap. He wears them constantly. His father says he does it to shut them out. He wants no part of his family. Except for the shoes. His father will take him to get new shoes.
We walk to the bridge. A perfect fall day. Our days like this are numbered. By Wednesday it will be wet and cold. Then it will get worse. I tell R-2 he is doing well. Friday is mid-quarter. He must not miss a day. He needs all his credits at mid-quarter. He says he will try but makes no promises. They have had no electricty since Friday. The house is cold. What do you do with out lights and heat? Nothing he says but sit in the dark with blankets and candles. Use cold water.
Our days like this are numbered. By Wednesday it will be wet and cold...then it will get worse.
B shows up 45 minutes late. He is nervous and unsure. He searches for my disapproval in a glance. He has court in 3 days. Later he asks "So how do you think I'm doin?" He has missed 4 days. Been late all the rest but 1. Missed his 1st counseling session. I say he's not doin so good. We won't be able to do this all year. His time is running out. They will force other options. There is a lot of work to do. He can do it. The choice is his. Even though it is beyond him. In many ways it is so beyond him. At this point all I can do is throw the dice and pray for luck.
N is in JDC. He will be there for at least 2 weeks. He is out of control at home and refuses to cooperate. We will wait for him. Things do not look good.
B-2 shows up 1/2 hour late. He missed last Thursday. His parents have called his PO. He says he is sick. His face is puffy and he seems congested. He is wearing a white parka that seems to fit him too small. He sits in a daze. His PO is gathering force.
L is not here today. This makes 2. It is hard to reach his dad. He works in a vault in a bank. We always get his voice-mail. He always responds with good intentions and concerns. L does not seem to do well on Mondays. It seems he spends the weekend at his mother's and must transition back to his father's late Sunday. 2 days is not bad but we are just getting started. It is easy for these things to tumble out of control.
R-1 is back. His PO did not find him over the weekend to give him his gift of 48 hours. He said that L was havig contractions and that he had to take her to the hospital. He could not call. He had no minutes on his cell. His home phone is disconnected. His PO comes by to see him but we are on a walk to the bridge. He knows now that his PO is gathering force.
A-2 is not here. He is always here. But not today. His father calls. Things are not good at home. A-2 refuses to go to school because he has no shoes. His father says there are 6 pairs in the closet. His headphones are an issue It's the gangster rap. He wears them constantly. His father says he does it to shut them out. He wants no part of his family. Except for the shoes. His father will take him to get new shoes.
We walk to the bridge. A perfect fall day. Our days like this are numbered. By Wednesday it will be wet and cold. Then it will get worse. I tell R-2 he is doing well. Friday is mid-quarter. He must not miss a day. He needs all his credits at mid-quarter. He says he will try but makes no promises. They have had no electricty since Friday. The house is cold. What do you do with out lights and heat? Nothing he says but sit in the dark with blankets and candles. Use cold water.
Our days like this are numbered. By Wednesday it will be wet and cold...then it will get worse.
posted by mg418 at 4:28 PM
3 Comments:
It's interesting to see you process these experiences. I'm curious to know about the success stories too. There must be some stories that give you hope and make you want to continue doing this. It would be very easy to give up. What does keep you there? Perhaps there has been a change over time--do the lives of these students become more chaotic over time, particularly over the last five years of the Bush dictatorship?
In Response to 868: It must be the journey itself that keeps me here. There is nothing to do but keep moving. It is also the folks around me with whom I have shared this journey for a long time. I am happy just to be along for the ride with them.
The lives would probably be the same no matter what. Poverty and ignorance and circumstance have always been around. It's just easier to see now. "The No Child" limits and restricts and compels how we work. The success stories are many but "The No Child" limits and restricts the definition of success.
As for "No Child", I have lately been calling it "No Child Who's Behind Left", which in light of your school's nature (a place where children who are behind are placed), that efficiently raises test scores for the schools where those students used to go. Bush's education sham works like the old shell game. You move the "bad" students out, and then presto! higher scores at the other schools, and Bush's sham looks like it's really working.
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